Found by Tatum O'Neal is the follow up to her first autobiography A Paper Life.
While the first covered her whole life, Found centers on the years after release of the book, and how examining your life through a 'tell-all' book doesn't exorcize the demons or clarify your relationships. She frankly deals with her addictions, raising her children and trying to reestablish her relationship with her actor father Ryan O'Neal. He was absent for most of her life, leaving her and her brother to fend for themselves. Once in her teens, he left her again for Farrah Fawcett. His view is Tatum made him choose between them, and he chose Farrah. She was married to John McEnroe for many years, and when that ended she moved back to LA and began acting again. Having been the youngest person ever to win an Oscar for Paper Moon at the age of 8, there is a strange sense of never living up to that peak.
Recently, Tatum and Ryan filmed a docuseries called "The O'Neals", where they examined their relationship, including therapy. It seems the show didn't bring them together, but she describes moments where they could see each others side, how each of them felt the other abandoned them, and how they might move forward. He seems to be a child when it comes to the relationship, forcing her to be the responsible one though she is longing for a fatherly connection. They are constantly butting heads and writing each other out of their lives, when you can see they each want a connection. They seem so busy telling their side, there is no conversation happening. She said she came up with the optimistic title of the book before she wrote it, believing that at the end there would be closure and the beginning of a healthy relationship. Refreshingly, this book has no happy ending, just the movement forward and continuing management of addiction.
I loved the way she wrote this, very frank and open. You can sense with each turn that she is trying her best to open the doors, to look honestly at both sides, the good as well as the bad. When she slips up and gets caught trying to buy crack on a NY street, she can see the issues that prompted it, and deals with the situation well. This is an honest and emotional look at a turbulent life, and the road leading towards the future. I enjoyed hearing her story, the way you enjoy listening to a friend and hopefully helping. She has a lot of insights which apply to family relationships that hit the nail on the head. After reading A Paper Life and this follow-up Found, I feel like I know her, sympathize with her, and in some way by supporting her books, supporting her.
2011 / Hardcover / 304 pages
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