Private by James Patterson

Private is the start of a new series from Maxine Paetro writing with James Patterson.

I have to say, I didn't finish this book.

So if you are a fan, look away.

Private is the first of a new series, followed by Private London, Private Games, Private #1 Suspect, etc. It deals with "the most successful and sexiest PI firm in the world". The cast seems cookie-cutter from a rejected spec script for CSI Miami. The barest of bones characters are basically summed up in a few sentences. Think airplane movie that is too dull to pay attention to. Just turn the brightness of the screen down and try to get some sleep.

A review claims "Slick and suspenseful in the usual well-received Patterson style (succinct and simple chapters). A great way to spend an afternoon!"

Not to be taken seriously, this can be read in an afternoon, but you still want to be entertained, and not feel like it's a waste of time.

The Patterson style is light mysteries with short chapters, in a way that has to be seen to be believed. Most are two pages, making the book a whopping 124 chapters. Some chapters are one page long. Just like with Salman Rushdie.

I have a problem with manufactured books by commitee. There used to be authors I would faithfully buy in hardcover, such as Stuart Woods. Then the titles began coming out every 6 months, then 3 months, and they lost their voice.

James Patterson is a bestselling name in an industry that has co-authors write a thriller released under his brand. They are instant hits, but he himself does not write several books a month. With too many co-authors to list, in several genres, Patterson is in the Guinness Book for having released more bestsellers than anybody, ever.

Private by Maxine Paetro was unexciting and poorly written. You can do better.

2011 / Paperback / 416 pages